NEWS

Working with treatment-resistive families

July 28, 2010

Recently, two members of West Ridge Academy's executive staff held a workshop on a very important and relevant topic – helping treatment-resistive families find solutions and hope.

Michael L. Ruoho, clinical director of West Ridge's Girls Campus set out three objectives for the workshop: 1) Increase awareness of how treatment-resistive families act and look; 2) identify challenges these clients present to staff and professionals; and 3) provide tools and strategies for working with treatment-resistive families.

He said it is common for parties to "play the victim" by not taking responsibility for their actions, hold others and the program accountable for their resistance or blame others and make their issues about others.

"Why do they do this?" the two asked in the workshop. "Answer: fear and pain, which are learned behaviors. They will tell you what you want to hear, and create distractions to take focus away from what is really going on."

Often, parties will triangulate and split, won't follow counsel, are looking for the "magic cure" and "want change NOW!" as well as want to control everything.

Other tactics include a manipulation "playbook," designed to wear you out or "play" you to avoid issues and cause you to question your own skills and knowledge.

But the solution, they say, is by teaching that "the only way out is through these issues, not around."

"Confront the resistance by focusing on what is behind their resistance," they said. "Don't personalize it. Separate person from performance and help clients identify resistance."

Ruoho asked, "Use yourself as a guide: When you are resistive to change or to feedback what is behind your feelings of resistance?

"Remember, it is the same for our families," he answered. "Help families through their resistance by treating them the way you would want to be treated. Usually what works for us will work for our clients."

He added:: "Resistance can be the best source of information about your families and their issues if you will look at what their resistance is telling you. What issue(s) it is masking?"

He offered some strategy and tools.

"Give meaningful assignments, ones that promote awareness and understanding, including role-playing, setting boundaries, using impact letters, communication skills and demonstrating problem-solving and expression of feelings skills."

Also, communicate regularly. "Get them invested in the journey. Show empathy, walk the journey with them," they added. "Let them know they are not alone. Point out the support system they have, or make one with them if necessary."